Who are you?

Who you think you are - limits your potential.

We seem to live within a societal ‘norm’ that means who we are is defined by what we do, who we are to other people and all the labels that we and others may put on us.

Who are you?

The answer to that question often goes something like this… I'm Mary, wife of Fred, mother of two. I'm a Finance Director, a rugby fan, a runner. I'm a detail person, love finance and task, I'm not good with people. I'm shy, not confident, I like one-to-one relationships but am not good in larger groups. I'm also not good at conflict. 

The list, of who I think am and what I think about myself, goes on and on…

By the time you reach 42, according to psychologists, you've had over a billion thoughts. Many millions of those thoughts you have are about yourself and are repeated. They become subconscious - fixed paradigms, or labels.

You end up believing that is who you are. 

Your thinking is a trap

These labels, these paradigms, are a trap. They're a trap because you can easily limit how you think and behave. So, if you tell yourself 'I'm an introverted person’, ‘I’m not kind’, ‘I’m not good in large groups’, 'I'm impatient' - then guess what? That thinking will dictate how you come across and the results you get.

Research from the Institute of Noetic Sciences also shows that the more fixed you are about who and what you are, the lower your wellbeing. This means - fixed thinking about self = more stress, less vitality, and greater risk of illness or disease. 

Your natural self is undefinable

The truth is - when you're in flow state or in the zone, what we might call your natural self, you're not thinking much at all. You're actually undefinable, you're just 'being', just operating. And in this flow state, you have the potential to be what you need to be in any moment. When you're not thinking about it or defining yourself, you can be kind, confident, creative, powerful… in fact anything. You can be free from the baggage of being something based on your own inner-dialogue.

Think about it, there's no such thing as an unconfident person. Everyone is confident at some things, and unconfident at others. And it's just their thinking that makes them so. 

Less Is So Much More

Some points to reflect on:

  • The thinking you have about yourself is limiting you. 
  • Who you are is not really who you think you are. 
  • There's a natural self, when you're in flow, that is undefinable and way more powerful than the identity you've created. 
  • The less you define yourself the better. It enables you to be free, agile and unlimited.